“If I am to believe that Love is a synonym for God, then how is it that I have experienced Love? I will attempt to offer some information about this in tomorrow’s revelation of this man’s search for a(the) Higher Power. ” Posted 11.5.2011.
Why is it so easy for us to understand Love but so difficult to express?In cruising the internet and even by turning the pages of the reference books that have graced my shelves for a lifetime, I encounter phrases such as “Unconditional Love” or “Searching for Love”. By using an adjective to this Noun among nouns we destroy the true meaning of the word. Redundancy has this effect. Love is by logical definition, unconditional. Without that quality it cannot be trusted. And because humans are imperfect, totally selfish beings we place a condition on everything we do. So what are we to do? We obviously need love. We “Search for Love”, we seem to feel love for our families and friends, but always there is a condition. Again, what are we to do?
The answer is to practice. We practice humanly traits which appear to be components of Love. We become aware of the difficulty of loving, acknowledge the reality and move on to serving others. When we do loving things for others and practice doing these things without expectation of reward we discover that we begin to like ourselves more, a feeling which evolves into acceptance of self and of others. And Love begins to grow.
So, back to our growing understanding of our temporary definition of God as Love. We agreed for the moment that to remove from our vision of God, all concepts of time and that to say that God created All that there Is including Himself is also to say that God evolved as the Ultimate Result of All that There is and that God Is All that there is. And so, the Love that God is, is Self Love. And, if we are to model ourselves after God’s example, then we are to Love by Loving ourselves first. And that First Love occurs by practicing the traits of Love as we work as individuals to help those who are placed in our paths and who ask for that help.
When I was 2 1/2 years old two things happened. First I was abandoned by my father as he said goodbye and told me that I was in charge of our family until his return from war. taking care of baby brother Bill would be the easy part. The difficult family member would be my irresponsible drunken Mother. Shortly thereafter, Mother abandoned Bill and me as the first stage in starting life anew with another man. The act of abandonment in each case stirred an instant awareness of the choice I had to make. It wasn’t a conscious choice but one that was presented in an instant and demanded an answer. Was I to accept early adulthood or would I choose to be a victim. I chose the more responsible role. And I have been given this option many times since. There was a third choice; I could choose to procrastinate. I have at these different times in my life, opted for all three of these choices but the earliest of these was always to be the Adult. With that choice came responsibilities such as finding a new home for Brother and Me. Which I did. And I had to protect my brother/ I did that also. I even protected Mother until she decided that she needed more protection than I had to offer. But in the rejection by my parents and with the apparent loss of their love, came a new Love. Though I was not aware of it at the time, caring for Baby Brother Bill brought to me a love so powerful that it replaced the loss of Love that could have brought me to a different choice; I could have become a victim right then and there. My point in describing my life history is to give one of the few example I have about the subject of this document. More tomorrow.