Curious Abner Meets the Alpha and the Omega.

Continued from yesterday’s post:

 Curious Abner: Cool. ………..,(but) I’m still high?

Psychoactive Toad: I don’t know. I think it’s starting to wear off.

Curious Abner: Why do you say that?

Psychoactive Toad: Ribbit.

Curious Abner: Huh?

Psychoactive Toad: Ribbit.

Curious Abner: I’m gonna put you back down where I found you, you dumb toad. Go find yourself a cricket.

Psychoactive Toad: Ribbit.

Curious Abner: Hey Jesus. Where are ya Dude? We need to talk……….


Jesus: Hello Abner.

Curious Abner: Dude. Jesus, is that you?

Jesus: I am Jesus; yes I am.

Curious Abner: Wow. I guess you are kinda psychedelic at that, Do you know a Toad named Psycho?

Jesus: I do.

Curious Abner: He has lickky stuff all over him. People lick that stuff off his back, which gives them a religious experience.

Jesus: I know about that.

Curious Abner: Yeah, well, I still don’t get it.

Jesus: Get what Abner?

Curious Abner: Hey, I’m standing here talkin’ to an invisible man or maybe even a Ghost and the Ghost is talkin’ back. That sounds pretty weird to me.

Jesus: I see what you mean.

Curious Abner: Well, I’m glad one of us can see. Can you see me?

Jesus: I can.

Curious Abner: Well, howsabout balancing things up here. It’d be nice if I could see you.


Jesus: How’s this?

Curious Abner: Dude, that’s a cool thing ya do there. You look like a hippy. Cool jeans. I like your sandals. Where’d ya get that fancy hiker’s stick.

Jesus: I made it. I enjoy making things of wood. I’m a carpenter.

Curious Abner: Really. I hope you don’t go ’round hiding from your customers all the time. Seems to me, that’d be bad for business.

Jesus: Oh, I see what you’re saying. No, Abner; carpentering is a hobby. Saving souls is my business.

Curious Abner: So, carpentering is your hobby and shoe repair is your business. Could you make me some sandals like those you’re wearing?

Jesus: By soul I mean you, Abner; not your shoes.

Curious Abner: I’m not a sole. I’ve been called a heel before but never a sole.

Jesus: Soul Abner. S.O.U.L.

Curious Abner: Wow. Psycho Toad was right Dude. You are definitely out there.

Jesus: Out there, up there. Yes, Abner you could say I’m just about everywhere.

Curious Abner: So what’s the matter with my soul? And, why do you want to fix me?

Jesus: What are you afraid of Abner?

Curious Abner: Not much of anything, Jesus. Really.

Jesus: Go on.

Curious Abner: Well, girls maybe, a little bit. You know what I mean.

Jesus: Yes, Abner. I know what you mean. What else.

Curious Abner: Failing.

Jesus: Yes, that’s pretty scary, isn’t it.

Curious Abner: Duhh. Not as scary as dying.

Jesus: I know what you mean.

Curious Abner: Really?

Jesus: Really. Been there, done that.

Curious Abner: Done what? You died? I’m lookin’ atcha Dude.

Jesus: Yes. And I’m looking at you Abner.

Curious Abner: C’mon, you know what I mean; you’re still a young man. How old are you?

Jesus: I guess you could say that depends on your point of view.

Curious Abner: Whaddaya mean?

Jesus: To some I am one day old. To others I am 2012 years old, today. A lot of  folks are celebrating my birthday today. But, from my point of view I have been here forever and I will always be here.

Curious Abner: Wow, Dude that’s pretty cool. I want what you’ve got.

Jesus: Are you willing to go to any lengths to get it.

Curious Abner: Well, Duhh. I mean sure. What do I have to do?.

Jesus: You’ve already done it Abner, and so have I. It’s all yours.

Curious Abner: Dude, Thanks. Happy Birthday, Jesus.

Jesus: Happy Birthday, Abner.

Lee: Merry Christmas everyone.


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