Today I was admitted for cataract surgery. I perceive this to be a very dangerous surgery, considering my problems of macular degeneration and glaucoma. Fifteen years ago I saw what a well intended surgery did to my left eye: this morning I bailed at the last-minute.
My life has been devoted to the arts. I began as a child, learning about my world by drawing it. I learned more about life by singing about it, writing about it, dramatizing it, rhyming, strumming, carving pieces of it away. All of the arts are special to me but none, not even the near total of all can compare with the beauty as beheld by those who still can see. I have been a volunteer in support of those who without eyesight for thirty years. Most of them were born with fairly normal vision.
I still have two choices. I can run the risk that my right eye if tinkered with by one of the world’s best surgeons will provide me with the best vision I‘ve ever known or that I will lose it. One small advantage is that if the surgery is a success I can continue to drive, a daily task which in a city with primitive public transportation is vital to all of my work. Ah yes; the work.
Tomorrow I will spend in meditation. Today I am ruing the cowardly decision with which I greeted the day. I am not saying that I think the decision was wrong; only that I was wrong.
Today, I forgot for a moment, the prayers of friends and family.
Today I was given a few more days to gather additional information.
Today, for that I am grateful. Perhaps those prayers are being answered.